Live, Laugh, Love…

“All this and Heaven too.” That quote has come to my mind many times these last few months. The dark nights make the sunshine seem that much more golden. The last few months have been filled with living, laughing, and loving.

 Days that follow a wonderfully simple pattern, filled with everything that makes the little moments beautiful. Laughing at the crazy things my kids say or do. Laughing when that was the only option besides getting frustrated. Laughing silently when my babies tested me or someone else, and then made the cutest, cutest face ever.

 Loving my crazy afterschoolers. Loving my adorable pre-k girls who said they wanted to be (among other things) an elf, a “hawrstywist”, and (my personal favorite), a church-girl. Loving my stubborn four year olds, who say the funniest (and awkward) things. Loving my three year olds who always fight for space on my lap. Would you believe they can fit four of them on at one time?! Loving that they love doing my hair, talking to me instead of taking a nap, and most of all LOVE kissing me. Loving my oh so troublesome two and a half year olds, no matter how very much they try my soul. Love, love, Loving my two year olds, who make my heart so full. Loving the little stubborn girl who gives the best hugs. Loving the cuddly little man who calls me BooBekah. Loving the mischevious little guy who always talks in the deepest voice you can imagine in a two year old. Loving my precious little girl who always shows me her shoes, her lovie, and her bows. Loving her because she finally loves me enough to let me do her hair without fussing Loving doing her beautiful hair. Loving my little man who calls me Betta, and says the craziest things. Loving my sweet little boy with the beach boy haircut who never ever wants to let go of me. Loving my one year olds who have the most energy ever. Loving my babies. Loving my baby boy, even though he NEVER takes a nap. Loving his smile, loving his nose, loving his tiny hands, and loving his baby smell.

Living my days post-kiddos by relaxing. Living and enjoying the sunny Mondays at the river. Forgetting time and sitting simply on the big rock in the middle, talking with my wonderful sisterchicks. Laughing about life, and love. Laughing at ourselves, and life. Loving these sunny days.

He Hides a Smiling FAce

“God moves in a mysterious way
His wonders to perform;
He plants His footsteps in the sea
And rides upon the storm.

Deep in unfathomable mines
Of never failing skill
He treasures up His bright designs
And works His sovereign will.

Ye fearful saints, fresh courage take;
The clouds ye so much dread
Are big with mercy and shall break
In blessings on your head.

Judge not the Lord by feeble sense,
But trust Him for His grace;
Behind a frowning providence
He hides a smiling face.

His purposes will ripen fast,
Unfolding every hour;
The bud may have a bitter taste,
But sweet will be the flower.

Blind unbelief is sure to err
And scan His work in vain;
God is His own interpreter,
And He will make it plain.

Behind a frowning providence,

He hides a smiling face.”

~William Cowper

Because He Lives

He came to love, heal and forgive;
He lived and died to buy my pardon,
An empty grave is there to prove my Savior lives! 


Because He lives, I can face tomorrow,
Because He lives, all fear is gone;
Because I know He holds the future,
And life is worth the living,
Just because He lives!

How sweet to hold a newborn baby,
And feel the pride and joy he gives;
But greater still the calm assurance:
This child can face uncertain days because He Lives!

Because He lives, I can face tomorrow,
Because He lives, all fear is gone;
Because I know He holds the future,
And life is worth the living,
Just because He lives!

 And then one day, I’ll cross the river,
I’ll fight life’s final war with pain;
And then, as death gives way to vict’ry,
I’ll see the lights of glory and I’ll know He lives!

Because He lives, I can face tomorrow,
Because He lives, all fear is gone;
Because I know He holds the future,
And life is worth the living,
Just because He lives!

 

Hope Again

• “When we are trapped in a tunnel of misery, hope points to the light at the end.
• When we are overworked and exhausted, hope gives us fresh energy.
• When we are discouraged, hope lifts our spirits
• When we are tempted to quit, hope keeps us going.
• When we lose our way and confusion blurs the destination, hope dulls the edge of panic.
• When we struggle with a crippling disease or a lingering illness, hope helps us persevere beyond the pain.
• When we fear the worst, hope brings reminders that God is still in control.
• When we must endure the consequences of bad decisions, hope fuels our recovery.
• When we find ourselves unemployed, hope tells us we still have a future.
• When we are forced to sit back and wait, hope gives us the patience to trust.
• When we feel rejected and abandoned, hope reminds us we’re not alone…we’ll make it.
• When we say our final farewell to someone we love, hope in the life beyond gets us through our grief. “

Introduction to my favorite book, “Hope Again” by Chuck Swindoll

One People

A friend and I sat in a quiet little corner of a very busy coffee shop. We had finally come up with a good evening to just be together. We wanted to talk about what God was doing in our lives. As we sat there talking and sharing our hearts, a young lady walked into the coffee shop. Wearing a leopard print skirt and leather jacket, she quickly ordered coffee and then sat near us. Honestly the first thought that crossed my mind was not whether or not she knew Jesus, but that she wasn’t dressed like us. A short time later she made a phone call and then began to talk to someone about their plans for their Bible study later that day. It suddenly dawned on me that so often we have no idea that others around us are our brothers and sisters in Christ.

Two weeks later I walked up to a home and rang the doorbell. I was welcomed inside and greeted with a kiss. It was shortly followed by another kiss on the left cheek, as is the custom when greeting someone in an Arabic nation. I wasn’t there for a visit, but rather for an Arabic church service. Arabic Christians from two states were coming together to fellowship, worship, and learn about our Lord. Although I don’t understand the language, I had something in common with these people. They were from all different countries, some including Lebanon, Syria, Saudi Arabia, and Egypt, to name a few. All live in the United States, and some have been here for quite some time, and have raised families. One man shared how they had been forced to leave Syria, but that God had greatly used that event in his life to bring him to this point.

As they lifted their voices in their own unique style of worship, I found tears in my eyes. I could not understand the words that they were singing, but I knew from the looks on their faces, and the joy in their song, that they were worshipping the same Jesus that I love. As the message was quietly translated for us in the corner, my heart was stirred. I looked around the room, listened to the quiet exclamations of “ah-meen” (amen), and found myself marveling at the body of Christ. How is it that we can’t even communicate in the same language, look nothing alike, but we are all servants of the same Lord? I began to really do some thinking about the body of Christ. It truly is something amazing.

In my devotions I came to 1 Corinthians 12:12-13, which says “For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ. For in one Spirit we were all baptized into one body, Jews or Greeks, slaves or free—and all were made to drink of one Spirit.” We were all made to worship one Lord, one Savior, one Jesus.

The things of this world; our culture, our home, our country, seperate us from each other. But one day in Heaven we will all be one people, praising a holy God forever.

Just For A Moment…

 Over a month ago now, I first wrote about Spain. So many things were still up in the air. So many things needed to be worked out. A couple of weeks later, several things happened to make me doubt that I would get to go. I remember crying out to God, asking for an answer, and grace to accept that answer. God has truly taken me through a time of testing. Testing of my will, obedience to Him and others, and my least favorite thing in the world…patience. (I am SO not patient).  

God is still faithful, throughout all those nights with no answers. So much good came through that time of waiting. A lot of pruning was done in my heart, and I praise God for revealing my stubborn pride to me. Once I had finally given this trip back to God, which came from Him anyway, I still did not know how God was going to work everything out. Suddenly, email after email came from Spain, details flew into place, dates were set, and an amazing ticket was found.

Last week, with my family sitting around watching, I bought my ticket to Spain. It still hadn’t really hit me that night. Little by little it would sink in, and I would randomly scream, something I’m not sure my family appreciated, but they graciously understood.

But it really still had not sunk in to my heart. My head knew I was going. People knew I was going, but it still sounded weird to me when they said the words “You’re going to Spain!” Sunday afternoon I began to look at pictures, trying to imagine what I would see. I thought to myself “wow, that’s a beautiful place!” and then suddenly it hit me.

I am going to Spain! It has been sinking in slowly, but surely. And everytime I remember that I’m going to Spain, just for a moment, I can barely breathe…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For more information on the family team I will be ministering with, please visit That All May Know.

The Treasures of the Trial

“Jesus draw me ever nearer,
As I labor through the storm.
You have called me to this passage,
and I’ll follow, though I’m worn.

May this journey bring a blessing,
May I rise on wings of faith;
And at the end of my heart’s testing,
With YOUR likeness let me wake.

Jesus guide me through the tempest;
Keep my spirit staid and sure.
When the midnight meets the morning,
Let me love You even more.
 

Let the treasures of the trial
Form within me as I go -
And at the end of this long passage,
Let me leave them at Your throne.

May this journey bring a blessing,
May I rise on wings of faith;
And at the end of my heart’s testing,
With YOUR likeness let me wake.”
- Keith and Kristyn Getty

I’ll Never Miss Heaven for the World

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Beyond the borders of time there’s a beautiful land
Where the word of God is glory unfurled
And by the grace of God, I someday will call it my home
I’ll Never Miss Heaven for the world!

I’ll never miss seeing Jesus,
I’ll never miss seeing loved ones who’ve gone on before
I’ll never trade forever for a few days down here
I’ll never miss heaven for the world.

 As for me and my house we will serve the Lord
Though the things of earth may try to allure
For the smile of God means more than sin’s brief glittering days
I’ll never miss heaven for the world.

I’ll never miss seeing Jesus,
I’ll never miss seeing loved ones who’ve gone on before
I’ll never trade forever for a few days down here
I’ll never miss heaven for the world.

 When we get to that place, it’ll be worth going through
All the trials and afflictions down here
I’m going to finish this race, going to see Jesus’ face
I’ll Never miss heaven for the world!

I’ll never miss seeing Jesus,
I’ll never miss seeing loved ones who’ve gone on before
I’ll never trade forever for a few days down here
I’ll never miss heaven for the world.

~ Author unknown

There Comes Beauty From Pain

 

Once my life was a journey in sunshine,

Each moment seemed like a piece of Heaven.

There was joy in the air, my heart was so full,

And there were friendships so priceless and rare.

 

I knew nothing of pain of the heart,

No needs or wants were ever denied.

I knelt rarely to pray for,

I needed Jesus for nothing.

 

Then the Father saw me,

 happy there ,content without Him

So with tears in His eyes He said

“My child, I love you more than you know.

So I take from you now, all of your things,

And all that you love, for you do not love me.

 

With that, the black clouds rolled into my life.

I trudged down the path,

lonely, hurting, confused, and I cried.

I said “Jesus I need my things, those that I love.

They are everything.

They are all that I have.”

 

My Lord saw my heart,

Which was bitter and hard,

So He took one more step,

And then broke me inside.

 

The storm clouds broke as I fell to me knees,

Bleeding, broken, shattered inside.

 My knees which were soft from not seeking His face,

Were now bruised from the stone on the path in my way.

 

My heart shattered in pieces,

Which then fell to the ground,

Broken, worthless, unnoticed by all

 

I cried to my Savior in a voice filled with pain,

“Dear Jesus I need you, I love you, my All.

I see how you always wanted my love,

But I gave it away to others instead.”

As rain poured from the sky,

It mixed with my tears,

And watered the shattered pieces of my broken heart.

 

I wept and I prayed as the sun started to shine.

My eyes which once filled with tears,

Now filled with wonder at the miracle before me.

 

Where once lay the pieces of my shattered heart,

A fragile, tiny plant had begun to grow.

 

Out of my brokenness, washed by my tears,

Came a beautiful rose ,grown by the rain

 

Where before there was hardness,

 my heart was made soft.

The rain had a purpose,

I could now plainly see.

 

As I looked on in wonder,

I heard His still voice.

“My child, I love you, and now you can see.

There is strength in the weakness,

There is goodness in rain.

There is need for all seasons,

There comes beauty from pain.”

 -Me, 1/26/2009

Espana!

Awhile back I posted about a journey of faith that Jesus was taking me on. I hinted at things, and now as God has chosen to bring this path into the light, I feel I can share more about it.

When I was only twelve years old I felt that God was calling me to the mission field. I could hardly wait for the church service to be over to rush up to my dad (the pastor) and tell him. But God has simply not chosen to open any doors for overseas service. Each summer as others travel on missions trips I feel so left behind. As they share their stories and testimonies of changed lives I find myself in tears, longing so very much for that to be me. But each time so many things have blocked my way.

Back in September or October I was talking with my lifelong friend Deanna about my desire to serve overseas. I mentioned that I was open to traveling anywhere, even to Spain, where God has led them. She gave me information about how long I would be able to stay in Spain, when would be the best time to come, and gave some rough estimations about costs. I would be able to live with their family, help start their church, maybe work at some Christian camps, and a lot more. Immediately I felt God telling me that this was what He had been saving for me all these years. All those two week missions trips I missed are nothing compared to being able to live in a foreign country for 3 months with people my family has known for my entire life.

As I began to pray that God would open doors if He wanted me to go, my spiritual life grew so much. The amount of money I needed to earn/raise was staggering to me. The permission to be prayed in seemed like a huge challenge, and the list of obstacles grew with each day.

I decided to take a step of faith in November, and applied for my passport. Last year it was taking 6 months to get a passport, and I had exactly that much time before I needed to have it. There were questions about the paperwork that could possibly push things back even farther, and I had to just take it to the Lord. Only TEN days after submitting my paperwork I received my passport. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?! That was the first time that I truly felt God was going to continue to open doors for me.

A major burden on my heart was the desire to give away as much as possible to the people I would be serving with. Abigail and Lauren gave me a book by Randy Alcorn called The Treasure Principle. In it he compared giving to the work of a postal person. You wouldn’t expect them to simply take the mail home, but to deliver it to the recipient. So maybe when God gives us money to manage (because it’s all truly His anyway), we are simply to deliver it to the right person. For this reason I felt God burdening my heart to be able to earn as much of my way as possible, and use any gifts I might receive to pass on to others. I am so excited to see how much I can earn, save, and give away! After all, when you die you can’t take it with you, but you can send it on ahead.

The search for a job was long, and I wasn’t able to find anything as soon as I wanted it. My deadline was January, and I realized that if I didn’t have at least a part time job by January I would not be able to make the trip.

December found me googling jobs, quickly applying for one I never thought I’d get, and then receiving a call from them the very next day. I interviewed that next week, and then waited through the long Christmas and New Years break for news. Finally (God’s time sure is slower than my time : ) ) I heard back that I did indeed have the job! It has far exceeded my expectations. I went to work the first day with a card in my pocket that read “Press toward the Goal,” to remind myself that no matter how I liked it, I must press on. I came home from the first day rejoicing and saying “I LOVE MY JOB!” How amazing is God? Really, to provide everything when I truly needed it, and then, He throws in an amazing job, because He can. I give Him praise for truly knowing and fulfilling the desires of my heart.

Right now I am planning to leave for Spain, Lord willing. There are still obstacles to be overcome, plans to be made, and things to be worked out. I am already in love with the country, and cannot imagine how amazing this will be. God is teaching me so much about submission, faith, trust, hope, dying daily, and obedience. I cannot begin to describe the journey in words, and I am excited that this is only beginning.

Please join me in praying for His will, for open doors, for the shutting of wrong doors, for provision, and for complete faith and submission to His heart’s desire for me. Thank you all for caring and praying. He is truly worthy to be praised.